So, ya, if you look at the timestamp (which I think may be off) you may notice that it is uncharictaristically VERY early in the morning (like 4:00 a.m.). For some reason all of a sudden I could not get comfortable in my bed and my leg kindof had a restless feel. Since I have no idea what real RLS feels like, it is the only thing I can describe it as. I haven't had that feelings since towards the end of my pregnancy. So it woke me up. I am hoping that by distracting myself for a while on the computer I will get tired enough again that I can go back to sleep. Tomorrow is going to be rough if it doesn't happen soon.
Last night I was thinking a lot about relationships. Particuarly marriage relationships. It is interesting me to see who people end up with. I don't see it as anyone got stuck with anyone else, but rather that we made a choice of who to be with. We may have felt at the time like there was no choice, we loved the person and that was that. But was it really that simple? Don't we choose to give our hearts to certain people, and to others we think better of it?
People who know me well know that Tyson was my first and only real boyfriend. But that doesn't mean I didn't have other options at various points in my life. What was it about Tyson that made it so easy for me to allow myself to be that vulnerable and open up my heart to him completely and no one else?
Part of it was timing. He was there at the right time in the right place. He had goals that were in line with what I wanted out of life. And of course isn't it always about timing? Most of the other guys that were "almost" boyfriends it was always the timing. I was too young, or he was just moving away, or something like that. So Tyson had that down....but it was much much more than that.
I turned to Tyson today and said "You know honey, of all the guys I
could have ended up with, I am so glad it was you." And I mean it. Tyson and I are not what I would call two peas in a pod, but rather two very different flavors that were meant to mingle. Like on Ratatouille, some foods are just better when they are mixed. Tyson plain and simple makes me happy. He makes me complete. I know that is clique to say, but it is true. I have a hard time loving myself a lot of the time, and he is always there to remind me that he loves me. He has taken care of me through my worst moments, and he is the most unselfish person on the planet. He is the world's greatest dad. Really, I am not just biased. How many husbands are the ones to wake up with the baby in the morning, because they know thier wife is not a morning person? And not just every so often, like EVERY day. Wow. I am often amazed at how wonderful he is and wonder why he picked me!
Anywho, that is what I have been thinking a lot about lately, so I thought I'd share. I guess I'd better go try and get some sleep.